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Note: I started writing this Wednesday afternoon, March 24th, and ended up having to finish it later. Wednesday I ended up with a migraine, and Thursday... well, Thursday was a long day. I worked on it some more Friday, got distracted over the weekend, and am now hoping to actually get this done today, the 29th. In case anyone, y'know, actually cares when I wrote this thing.

I have a killer headache coming on, which makes writing this now maybe not the best idea I've ever had, but whatever. I've dusted off this mun journal and have started trying to clean up the profile and update the icons and whatnot, because I'm actually *gasp* going to be trying to use it again.

Why, you ask? Because I'm going to start roleplaying again, if I can remember how. It's been a long time, but I think it'll come back to me. I'm going to be playing [livejournal.com profile] purelypansy in [livejournal.com profile] teamarchangel.

I love Pansy. In a lot of ways she's the most fun and unexpected character of mine to have come out of our old Harry Potter game. I remember taking her on kind of as a lark, after her old player- well, it's water under the bridge now. I told Star that I'd change things up a bit, maybe a lot, that I'd take the character in my own direction. As I recall she said something to the tune of, "Good", or "Fine, whatever, have fun." 'Cause she's cool like that. So I did. I went my own way, I had fun.

It's funny, because sometimes Pansy's the one I feel myself having to reach with the most, because we're pretty different. And then once I settle into her voice, it kind of just flows.

Back in the days of the HP game, I'd have told anybody who asked (not that you needed to, back then) that Penny was my favorite of the characters I played. I'm not sure that's true anymore. I love Penny, will always love writing Penny, but sometimes, sometimes she just makes my teeth hurt. And I don't mean that in a bad way, it's just- I gave Penny a lot of shit to cope with from her childhood, and when the HP game started, she was at a point where she was starting to overcome that stuff. Starting to grow up, figure out who she was, what she wanted. I kind of knew where I wanted her to end up- knew exactly where I wanted her to end up ship-wise. I always wanted her to end up happy, because she deserved it, and because writing that stuff, playing it out with my friends back then, was somehow what I needed. It was soothing. When I needed to chill out, calm down, de-stress, there was Penny, falling in love, making a family with her friends, fighting for the things she believed in, helping save the world.

I still go back to that stuff sometimes, to the old game posts and the fic I wrote back then, but it's- I don't want to say that I'm done with Penny, because I'll probably go back to her at some point, but I think she needs to spend, as she has been, some time on the shelf.

I want to do something new, anyway. And while I've played Pansy before, she was always second string to Penny. After a while, everybody was.

And Pansy is... I'm trying to think of how best to describe her, trying to decide what to write for her character information bio for [livejournal.com profile] teamarchangel and it's difficult. I always feel so self-conscious writing the personality stuff, like it's somehow not going to be good enough. I feel the same way about the backstory sometimes. Of course, I have a complex and someday I might even learn to get over it. Today? Not that day.

So, Pans. She started off, of course, the typical almost one-dimensional cardboard cutout in the Harry Potter books, the snobby Slytherin girl who hangs around/hangs all over Draco Malfoy. Boring. As usual I've taken the canon, what little of it there is, and run with it. I think I'll work on the backstory first, even though personality is listed first in the form, because I really think her personality comes from that, from where she's been. Her past doesn't define her, but it's a part of her.

More than anyone, including me, ever wanted to know about Pansy's past )

Okay, so I was right. That helped a lot with figuring out who Pansy is, where she comes from. Now onto the character info. Later, when LJ isn't lagging so damned bad.
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